On Motherhood and Happiness

I know I have totally slacked when it comes to blogging, but to he honest, taking time to sit down at the computer just hasn't been a priority to me.  I have been spending my time enjoying every second with my girls.  But, I've got to be better so I can get this thing ready to be made into a book.

Lately I have spent a lot of time thinking about happiness.  I think I am a pretty optimistic person for the most part and I try to be happy all the time, but I have decided that I need to apply that to all areas of my life.  Even the ones that I am not happy about.  My Dad and I talked about happiness lately and he reminded me that we only get one chance to be where we're at, so we might as well enjoy it.  He also mentioned that we would hate to look back and wish we had enjoyed life a little more instead of focusing on the things that are hard or seem difficult at the time.

Makes me think of this quote:

"...Every life has peaks and shadows and times when it seems that the birds don’t sing and bells don’t ring. Yet in spite of discouragement and adversity, those who are happiest seem to have a way of learning from difficult times, becoming stronger, wiser, and happier as a result.  -- Joseph B. Wirthlin

One of the things that is the most satisfying for me is being a mother.  I love my girls and I try to devote everything to them.  It doesn't come without its hardships and frustrations though.  That makes me think of this:


“When I was around thirteen and my brother ten, Father had promised to take us to the circus. But at lunchtime there was a phone call; some urgent business required his attention downtown. We braced ourselves for disappointment. Then we heard him say [into the phone], ‘No, I won’t be down. It’ll have to wait.’

“When he came back to the table, Mother smiled. ‘The circus keeps coming back, you know.’

“‘I know,’ said Father. ‘But childhood doesn’t.’
--Arthur Gordon

And this quote by Anna Quindlen:

“The biggest mistake I made [as a parent] is the one that most of us make. . . . I did not live in the moment enough. This is particularly clear now that the moment is gone, captured only in photographs. There is one picture of [my three children] sitting in the grass on a quilt in the shadow of the swing set on a summer day, ages six, four, and one. And I wish I could remember what we ate, and what we talked about, and how they sounded, and how they looked when they slept that night. I wish I had not been in such a hurry to get on to the next thing: dinner, bath, book, bed. I wish I had treasured the doing a little more and the getting it done a little less”

I try very hard to enjoy each moment and to make life enjoyable for my girls.  I try not to tell them no unless it's something that can harm them (a little advice I received from my mother in law).  I try to help them learn from everything.  I try to let them experience new things.  I try to let them make their own decisions.

But there are times when I feel I let things get in the way of those moments.  President Monson had this to say about that:

"...Make the most of today, of the here and now, doing all we can to provide pleasant memories for the future.  If you are still in the process of raising children, be aware that the tiny fingerprints that show up on almost every newly cleaned surface, the toys scattered about the house, the piles and piles of laundry to be tackled will disappear all too soon and that you will—to your surprise—miss them profoundly."

I love that quote.  Reading it always reminds me that I need to slow down and let things go.  The work will wait but the kids won't.

I have been wanting to savor every minute of life with my little family of four.  This summer will be unlike any other we have ever had, although we look forward to the changes.  Towards the middle to the end of June my girls and I will pack up and head to the Valley to patiently await the arrival of our newest addition.  (We still haven't decided when Jared will join us because we don't know what life will be like mid-summer.)  Addie is excited to go school shopping for the first time while we are there.  I'm excited with her but I also feel a little apprehensive.  She'll start kindergarten in August and it just reminds time isn't going to slow down any time soon.

So while the time will surely pass and there is nothing that I can do about it, I am trying hard to remember that it isn't what doesn't get done in a day, rather it's what is done in a day.  I have three loads of laundry in my laundry room waiting to be folded but yesterday moments like this were much more important to me.