The Heels

Warning: this post is slightly dramatic.  It may cause a few eye rolls and probably a "gimme a break" or two.

Remember these heels I bought recently?   Well, I finally wore them for the first time today.  It took me a while because it took a lot of preparation to do so.

When I bought them at the store I simply slipped them on my feet to make sure they fit right and did the height check so i wouldn't be taller than Jared.  They fit and I was still shorter than Jared.  But I mad a horrible error.  I didn't try walking in them.  Once I got home and put them on I took a few steps and realized I would be a terrible mess if I wore them out without learning how to walk in a pair of actual high heels.  That four inch heel was more than I could handle.

Enter YouTube.  I began watching videos on how to walk in heels.  They really weren't helpful at all.  So I started wearing them around the house every now and again for a few minutes at a time.  I even ran the vacuum in them once or twice.  I figured if I can vacuum with them then surely I could walk the halls at church for a few hours.  It sounded reasonable at the time and I managed to learn to walk without wobbly ankles and stiff knees.  

So this morning I slipped them on thinking I was finally prepared.  I concentrated as I walked in to church making sure I didn't look foolish and as though I had sore thighs or something.  I even had to get up and walk out twice with Lucy (mind you, we sit in the very front in the second pew) and made it just fine.  And the compliments.  Girls were loving them! 

Then something happened.  I noticed my big and second toes on my left foot were numb.  And my big toe on my right foot was beginning to feel sore from rubbing on the side of the shoe.  And it didn't stop there.  I had to conduct Sharing Time in Primary and my feet were beginning to ache as I made my way to the podium and back to my seat numerous times. 

Finally the ball of my foot began to ache so badly that I found myself taking baby steps and walking slower than Lucy.  When Church finally ended luck would have it that i had to go from one side of the building clear to the other to find Jared and back again to get to my truck.  I seriously could hardly walk to the truck and was praying a car didn't drive into the parking lot because I wouldn't be able to hurry.  Then again being hit by a car wasn't sounding so bad either at that point.

I finally got in and removed the shoes from my feet, all the while whaling like an animal in distress.  I told the girls my feet felt like they were going to come off and Addie told me she knew what would made them feel better.  A foot rub!  She sings my song. 

I drove home complaining the whole way.  I told the girls they should have warned me and not talked me into buying the blasted shoes.  Then I got home and wanted to cry because I had to put the shoes back on.  My hands were full and I had to carry Lucy in leaving me no choice but to put the shoes back on my feet and try to make it to the door. 

I walked very slowly cringing the whole way.  Once I hit the laundry room I did the thing I hate that my girls do, I took my shoes off and left them right there.  Then I tried to readjust to walking flat footed.  My feet were sore.  Plain and simple.  Very sore.  My tender feet ached every time I took a step and they hit the tile.

My mind turned to all the ladies who wear orthopedic shoes and suddenly they didn't sound so bad.  Then the soreness started to wear off and I realized my thinking must be clouded because that really does sound bad! 

So for now I am retiring the shoes.  Yes, they are so cute and yes, I loved they way they looked but until I forget about how miserable I was and once again think I am ready to wear them again they will live in my closet.  And I will enjoy that foot rub Addie promised to give me.