Sunday, September 13, 2009

They say things happen in three's

So once again I have been missing from the blogging world. But, this time I have a really good reason!

For about the last two weeks I have been trying to spend every chance I get with Jared's Grandparents. Two weeks ago Friday, Grandma Miller called and asked Jared to come to Show Low and help Grandpa. He had fallen and she wasn't able to help him up. He weighs about 135 lbs. but she didn't have the strength to help him. Once Jared got up there and realized that Grandpa (who suffers from dementia) hadn't eaten all week and that he needed medical attention, took him right to the hospital. They also discovered that he had double pneumonia. On Tuesday, Grandma joined him. She was admitted for an infection and was just two doors down.

We spent any free time we had at the hospital keeping them company and enjoying our time with them. Jared's aunt (their only child, since Marlene passed away) had also come from Safford. Aunt Kathi was being spread very thin trying to be everywhere and take care of everyone so we tried our best to help out where we could. Once Grandpa was released he wasn't able to be home alone so everyone (a home health nurse, Jared's brothers, me, Aunt Kathi and probably more that I am not thinking of) took turns staying with him. He is so pleasant that it was not a burden at all!

To make a long and confusing story short, Grandma was moved to ICU. She suffers from severe spinal stenosis, arthritis and blocked arteries so the pain her her legs was basically unbearable. After a few days there they decided that Hospice might be the next best option because they would be able to manage her pain better. She wasn't sent to Hospice because she was nearing death, but simply so that they could help get her pain under control. She was admitted on Tuesday afternoon and was doing okay, all things considered.

But, on Thursday afternoon it was like she just gave up. I took my girls up to see her on Thursday night and as soon as I saw her it felt like I was having deja-vu. She looked just like my mother in law did in the days before her death. I told Grandma that I was there and grabbed her hand. She woke up from her sleep and slowly tried to turn her head to look at me and just as soon as she focused her eyes on me, she was once again asleep. I talked to her and told her that I was glad to see her and told her how much I loved her. It was actually pretty difficult to hold back the tears. I kissed her hands over and over because I knew she could hear and feel me.

That night we got the call that they didn't think she would make it through the night. But of course no one can really guess that! She was still with us on Friday as well as Saturday. I was able to leave my kids with a friend (thanks again, Jonni!) and enjoy the day with family and friends at Hospice. Her sister came from Wickenburg, her nephew and niece from Illinois, and most of her great grand-children. It was a great blessing.

After everyone left and all of the family was able to say their good-byes, she passed peacefully a few hours later, at about 2:30 this morning. Both of her pride-and-joys were able to be at her side, her oldest grand-daughter, Yvette and her daughter Kathi. Grandpa was at home but was able to see her body one last time after her death.

It's comforting to know that the pain she has been in over the last few months is gone and that she is with Marlene. I talked to Addie about the fact that Grandma would soon die and when I asked her what she thought about it she said, "I think that her and Grandma Hatch will take good care of Marley's baby brother."

I think you're right, Addie.

(And now in true Kobie fashion, you can expect lots of stories about my time with Grandma in the next few weeks!)

5 comments:

RPH said...

Such a sweet post. Although it seems like you have seen your share of death lately, I am glad your kids understand what is happening. I love that Addie knows where she is. So sweet.

Travis & Allie said...

Thank you for posting this even though you made me cry. And you know what keep the stories coming whatever helps, I know that is one thing I have learned. We love you!

Newman Family said...

My heart goes out to you all!

Ashby said...

We were so sad to hear of Grandma Miller's passing. You are so sweet to spend so much time with her and to take your girls to see her. I can only imagine how much she loved seeing you guys before she went. I hope everyone is doing okay! Please let me know if there is anything I can do to help you!

The Varo's said...

i'm so sorry kobie! this last year has been a doozy. i'm thinking about you sister!