Our Greatest Tools

One of my favorite memories created in the last few weeks was holding Marlene's hands. I don't think I will ever forget how they felt were or how soft they were. So many times all she wanted was someone to hold her hand.

One memory in particular sticks out in my mind. Her good friend, Pat Despain had come from Heber to see her. She wasn't able to stay as long as she would have liked, but they had a good visit. When Pat was done Jared walked her to the door and I went to sit by Marlene when I saw she had tears gently rolling down her face. I grabbed some tissues and wiped her tears. Marlene asked me to sit with her and hold her hand. I'm not sure how long I was there but I know it was for a while. I remember her telling me how much she loved me, as she always did, but even more so in the last few weeks. I told her that I loved her so very much as well. Her reply surprised me. She said, "sometimes I don't think I deserve it." I said, "no, no, no. Don't say that." I can't remember what I said after that but I am sure I tried to reassure her that she was worthy of it. How could she not be?

Another memory happened after we had taken her to the Hospice House. It was the Sunday before she died. She was pretty much gone. It was me, Jared and his older Burt and maybe even his sister, Yvette in the room. I was sitting on Marlene's bed holding her hands in mine when I decided to speak up and talk to her, thinking there was a chance she would hear me.

I said, "Marlene, think of all the things you have done with your hands. All of the roses bushes you have planted, all of the babies you have held, every meal you have made, every tear you have wiped, every kind note you have written to a friend, every phone number you have dialed to call and check on a friend or to check on us, every present you have wrapped." Then Burt and Jared chimed in with some of their memories like playing catch and things such as that. I wish I could remember the whole list. I then told her they had been her greatest tools and that they had served their purpose. I remember holding them to my face and kissing them.

It got me thinking about what I am doing with my hands. Who am I serving? What do they get done through out the day? Do they ever get to do anything fun? Do I take care of them as if they were my greatest tools?

Just another life lesson I hope will make me a better person and that I never forget.

Our Greatest Tools

One of my favorite memories created in the last few weeks was holding Marlene's hands. I don't think I will ever forget how they felt were or how soft they were. So many times all she wanted was someone to hold her hand.

One memory in particular sticks out in my mind. Her good friend, Pat Despain had come from Heber to see her. She wasn't able to stay as long as she would have liked, but they had a good visit. When Pat was done Jared walked her to the door and I went to sit by Marlene when I saw she had tears gently rolling down her face. I grabbed some tissues and wiped her tears. Marlene asked me to sit with her and hold her hand. I'm not sure how long I was there but I know it was for a while. I remember her telling me how much she loved me, as she always did, but even more so in the last few weeks. I told her that I loved her so very much as well. Her reply surprised me. She said, "sometimes I don't think I deserve it." I said, "no, no, no. Don't say that." I can't remember what I said after that but I am sure I tried to reassure her that she was worthy of it. How could she not be?

Another memory happened after we had taken her to the Hospice House. It was the Sunday before she died. She was pretty much gone. It was me, Jared and his older Burt and maybe even his sister, Yvette in the room. I was sitting on Marlene's bed holding her hands in mine when I decided to speak up and talk to her, thinking there was a chance she would hear me.

I said, "Marlene, think of all the things you have done with your hands. All of the roses bushes you have planted, all of the babies you have held, every meal you have made, every tear you have wiped, every kind note you have written to a friend, every phone number you have dialed to call and check on a friend or to check on us, every present you have wrapped." Then Burt and Jared chimed in with some of their memories like playing catch and things such as that. I wish I could remember the whole list. I then told her they had been her greatest tools and that they had served their purpose. I remember holding them to my face and kissing them.

It got me thinking about what I am doing with my hands. Who am I serving? What do they get done through out the day? Do they ever get to do anything fun? Do I take care of them as if they were my greatest tools?

Just another life lesson I hope will make me a better person and that I never forget.

Warning! If coffins are not your thing then don't read this!

I know that I keep posting about my time in the Valley and about my Mother in law's death, but I want to document these things so that our family can remember. Plus, I want to do it while it is still fresh on my mind.

Believe it or not, Jared and his brothers (with some help from their cousin) made this.

They said that their Mom's proudest moment would have been when they walked into JoAnn Fabric's to pick out the lining. They are probably right!

It took about 100 man hours to complete and they did it in two days.Jared said that is was such a pretty thing to put in the ground and cover with dirt, but that his Mom didn't deserve anything else but the very best.

Every single piece was made by hand, with the exception of the hinge of course.
Not that it really makes a difference, but it is really cushy and comfy! I pressed on it with my hand but Jared actually got it in and closed the lid. That's where I draw the line!

Warning! If coffins are not your thing then don't read this!

I know that I keep posting about my time in the Valley and about my Mother in law's death, but I want to document these things so that our family can remember. Plus, I want to do it while it is still fresh on my mind.

Believe it or not, Jared and his brothers (with some help from their cousin) made this.

They said that their Mom's proudest moment would have been when they walked into JoAnn Fabric's to pick out the lining. They are probably right!

It took about 100 man hours to complete and they did it in two days.Jared said that is was such a pretty thing to put in the ground and cover with dirt, but that his Mom didn't deserve anything else but the very best.

Every single piece was made by hand, with the exception of the hinge of course.
Not that it really makes a difference, but it is really cushy and comfy! I pressed on it with my hand but Jared actually got it in and closed the lid. That's where I draw the line!

Our first white Christmas

...partly because we are never home on Christmas Day.
(Please note that since Jared is out numbered 3 to 1, all of his presents were wrapped in bright pink Hannah Montana and baby blue Disney Princess wrapping paper. Poor guy. He needs a son.)

We finally got one! It might have been January 4th, but it was still a White Christmas for us! Since we weren't sure how long we were going to be in the Valley with Marlene, we decided to leave all of our presents at home and just celebrate when we returned. I am so glad we did it that way! My girls deserved it! They were such troopers over the 3 weeks we were there that they deserved a reward. I have to admit that it wasn't easy trying to tell Addie that Santa would be coming once more (he always stops at Grandma Hatch's house, too) since she was so good while we were away. I had a really hard time putting all of the presents under the tree and trying to tell myself that it would be fun to do it all over again. But when Addie came in my room to wake me up and let me know that Santa came and put a bunch of presents under the tree, it was totally worth it. She got some new hair clips in her stocking and when she opened them she screamed "ahhhh! clips!" And it was like that with every present. Even Kimber got excited. She loved her new jammies and had to try them on right away.

This picture makes me laugh. She got a set of twins and was so excited! But if you know Kimber at all, you know she isn't very gentle. Here she is beating them with Addie's rolling pin from the cooking set she got.

Here are our stockings. Marlene made them and kept them at her house, but requested that we take them home after this Christmas. Each year she fills them for every person in the family (that does not including the presents she buys for each person that won't fit inside). She made around 30 of these! They are done completely by hand and each one takes between 80-100 hours to complete. In 2002 she had four to complete. That was huge year for her, 2 new grandkids, 2 new daughters in law, a new high school to move into (she was the registar at Queen Creek High School for 12 years) and so much more. I don't know how she did it!

Each son or daughter in law got to pick their own and then each mom picks one out for their new baby. Now it's all up to us girls to keep the tradition going.

Addie's was done while Marlene was undergoing Chemo. Many times she would take it with her and work on it while the Chemo was being administered.

Kimber's was done while Marlene was undergoing Chemo as well. One of the side effects that came with that round was neuropathy, meaning she had no feeling in her fingertips.

Take a closer look at the detail. Every single peice is cut out of felt and sewn on. It is truly a labor of love!

Our first white Christmas

...partly because we are never home on Christmas Day.
(Please note that since Jared is out numbered 3 to 1, all of his presents were wrapped in bright pink Hannah Montana and baby blue Disney Princess wrapping paper. Poor guy. He needs a son.)

We finally got one! It might have been January 4th, but it was still a White Christmas for us! Since we weren't sure how long we were going to be in the Valley with Marlene, we decided to leave all of our presents at home and just celebrate when we returned. I am so glad we did it that way! My girls deserved it! They were such troopers over the 3 weeks we were there that they deserved a reward. I have to admit that it wasn't easy trying to tell Addie that Santa would be coming once more (he always stops at Grandma Hatch's house, too) since she was so good while we were away. I had a really hard time putting all of the presents under the tree and trying to tell myself that it would be fun to do it all over again. But when Addie came in my room to wake me up and let me know that Santa came and put a bunch of presents under the tree, it was totally worth it. She got some new hair clips in her stocking and when she opened them she screamed "ahhhh! clips!" And it was like that with every present. Even Kimber got excited. She loved her new jammies and had to try them on right away.

This picture makes me laugh. She got a set of twins and was so excited! But if you know Kimber at all, you know she isn't very gentle. Here she is beating them with Addie's rolling pin from the cooking set she got.

Here are our stockings. Marlene made them and kept them at her house, but requested that we take them home after this Christmas. Each year she fills them for every person in the family (that does not including the presents she buys for each person that won't fit inside). She made around 30 of these! They are done completely by hand and each one takes between 80-100 hours to complete. In 2002 she had four to complete. That was huge year for her, 2 new grandkids, 2 new daughters in law, a new high school to move into (she was the registar at Queen Creek High School for 12 years) and so much more. I don't know how she did it!

Each son or daughter in law got to pick their own and then each mom picks one out for their new baby. Now it's all up to us girls to keep the tradition going.

Addie's was done while Marlene was undergoing Chemo. Many times she would take it with her and work on it while the Chemo was being administered.

Kimber's was done while Marlene was undergoing Chemo as well. One of the side effects that came with that round was neuropathy, meaning she had no feeling in her fingertips.

Take a closer look at the detail. Every single peice is cut out of felt and sewn on. It is truly a labor of love!

The Greatest Blessing of all

Many of you know already and many of you will be surprised to find out that my mother in law was not a member of the Church. First of all, her last name was Hatch. Plus, she raised 3 sons that served missions and all four of her kids are married in the Temple. She fully supported every one of them in those decisions as well as each grandchild's choice to be baptized when they turned 8. It shocked most people when they heard that, whether they personally knew her or not. Most of her friends were LDS and she was so Christlike all her life.


On December 14, two weeks and two days before her death, she was finally baptized, having never taken the missionary discussions. Oddly enough, she knew more about the church than a lot of members do. She was very intelligent and well read.


Jared and I were actually on our way down to be with her when we got the news. We were in Heber and were talking about that very thing. I asked Jared, "do you think she will ever join? Wouldn't it be a miracle if she decided to be baptized right now?" I swear it wasn't 3 minutes later Jared's brother called and said that the Mission President was on his way to the house to see her. Since she never had the discussions and she literally didn't have enough time to go through them, he came to see her.


I didn't know what the phone call was about but knew it was serious when Jared pulled over and wiped a few tears from his eyes. I could only hear one side of the conversation and assumed it was too late and that she had died. Jared was saying things like "Are you serious? , right now?, tonight? On Monday? Okay, we'll be there in a little bit" What was I supposed to think? After he hung up he didn't say anything. I looked and him and said "is she gone?" He said "no. My mom is getting baptized." We were both speechless. Tears were flowing and we just sat there in silence for a few minutes. We finally offered a prayer and headed back out.


That was Friday night. On Sunday night she was baptized. It was just the immediate family, plus one cousin that is more like a son anyway. It was short and sweet because her fragile body couldn't take it. Earlier in the day my dad and his counselors had come to see her and she asked them for a blessing. She blessed to have the strength that she would need to be baptized and I can tell you that that blessing was fulfilled. It wasn't easy for her, but she was able to do it.


To see her in white was the most wonderful thing I have ever seen and probably ever will see. It was the sweetest, most spiritual experience of my life. Michael, Jared's older brother did the baptizing and Jared was able to confirm her. The blessing was very sweet. There are things that were promised to her that none of us will ever forget.


After the confirmation, a couple of the grand kids went and hugged her and a line started to form. Each person hugged her and she was able to tell them that she loved them and something special about them. It was so very, very sweet. We were also able to take one last family picture that included everyone.




And now we are one step closer to an eternal family.